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I am Hem. Hem I am.
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That Hem-I-am! That Hem-I-am! I do not like that Hem-I-am!
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Do you like bad books and spam? |
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I do not like them, Hem-I-am. I do not like bad books and spam. |
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Would you like them here or there? |
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I would not like them here or there. I would not like them anywhere. I do not like bad books and spam. I do not like them, Hem-I-am. |
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Would you read them in a house? Would you write them with a mouse? |
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I do not read them in a house. I do not write them with a mouse. I do not read them here or there. I do not admit them anywhere. I do not like bad books and spam. I do not like them, Hem-I-am. |
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Would you put them in a box? Would you feed them with a fox? |
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Not in a box. Not to a fox. Not in a house. Not with a mouse. I would not read them here or there. I would not write them anywhere. I would not like bad books and spam. I do not like them, Hem-I-am. |
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Would you? Could you? In a car? Fuck you! Fuck you! Here they are.
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I would not, could not, in a car. You old drunk, shove it far. I would not deal with bad books or spam. Up your ass with a diesel car. |
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Fucking harpy! You ruined the rhyme scheme. |
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This was a stupid idea anyway, you old drunk. |
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It was paying homage to a true poet. |
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A poet? He was a sniveling idiot who insisted on treating our children like... |
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Children? |
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Exactly! |
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Go watch Schoolhouse Rock. |
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What? |
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Oh, this will be good...
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