Dustin: I don't want to talk first this time. How about YOU stepping up for a change, eh?

DJ: Actually, by saying you don’t want to talk first, you did. But I digress… Okay, so, for this edition of "Spoiler Warning," Dustin and I are going to take a look at Kicking and Screaming. No, not the recent Will Ferrell flick, but the 1995 debut of writer/director Noah Baumbach (who wrote and directed last year's critical darling The Squid and the Whale in addition to co-writing Wes Anderson's little epic The Life Aquatic. Dustin, I suggested this flick because of a love of Aquatic, like of Whale, and the fact that a co-worker of mine told me to check it out. Were you familiar with it?

Dustin: Good gravy man, where's the "hello"? You're supposed to make the people feel welcome! Let them know that as result of their direct input, we're reviewing this little flick! You could've championed democracy in action, and you missed the opportunity!

DJ: If I had a nickel for every missed opportunity... So, do you think your berating of me and what I was supposed to do as opposed to what I did was a sufficient greeting for our dear readers? Or should I do a little song and dance, too?

Dustin: I daresay that if are readers are used to anything around here, it's me berating you. At least by doing so, I'm providing a warm sense of familiarity. And please don't dance.

DJ: Fine. I had my cardboard thrown down and my boom box ready to go with some old school shit, but if you don't want me to dance, I won't. ... Where were we?

Dustin: Now would be an appropriate time for your intro. If you've read this far, please go back and read that now. I will give you all the time that you need... Okay? Good. Now, to answer your question Deej, no, I wasn't familiar with this particular work.

DJ: Well, for the readers in the same boat, behold the famed SPOILER WARNING SUMMARY: Following college graduation, Grover (Josh Hamilton) decides not to follow his girlfriend to Prague for post-graduate study, instead staying in the college town with three of his friends. With no idea what to do with their literature and philosophy degrees, the friends spend their time talking and complaining about the meaning of it all, having empty flings with freshman girls, slumming it at “menial” jobs, all the while hoping they don’t end up like Chet (Eric Stoltz), a 10th year student showing no signs of ever leaving the university.

Dustin: I wasn't altogether convinced that they all had jobs to begin with. Excellent recap, though.

DJ: I'm fighting the urge to edit that now... only one of the guys, Otis (a very funny Carlos Jacott), actually has a menial job, deciding to rock it at a local video store instead of leaving his friends for his engineering masters. And thanks for the "excellent" comment... I should submit that to imdb.com or some shit.

Dustin: Overall, I'm not really sure how I felt about this one -- I get the general idea that I should identify with one or more of the characters, and I really didn't make any kind of connection.

DJ: Seriously? See, I thought a lot of them kind of sounded like you. A little more "tuck your shirt in" or whatever than I am. I'm surprised you didn't connect to this chatty little flick... Seven years out of college, and I'm still worrying about a lot of the same crap as these characters.

Dustin: Maybe that's the missing link -- I might've been like one of these guys at one point, but I'm too far beyond that particular situation. Maybe I missed my window of opportunity to relate to it... if I had seen it when it first came out, which was when I was in college, I might have appreciated it from the standpoint of misplaced idolization (i.e. "I can see myself being like that after school”). There was probably about a two-year window after I graduated where this really would have hit home -- I was living with two of my fraternity brothers and spent most of a summer pining over a girl that had gone off to New York. This would've probably been perfect about then (although I instead glommed on to Jon Favreau's character in Swingers). But seeing it now, I can see shadows of relating to this, but I just can't get there because... well, I'll tell you in a second.

DJ: See... I never understand the "beyond that particular situation" reason for not relating to something. A college professor actually used that on me when giving me his opinion of Chasing Amy, which was out around the same time as Kicking and Screaming. It doesn't make sense to me when discussing this (or any) film because, while I'm older and longer out of college than these characters, I still have enough of a memory to relate to some of what they're going through. It's like saying I'm no longer a kid, so I can't enjoy The Goonies or-- wait... I didn't really enjoy The Goonies even when I was a kid. Bad example, but you see what I'm saying, right?

Dustin: I suppose so. Maybe it would've never been more than a near miss for me, even in that aforementioned window. I think maybe I've been too much of a workaholic to be one of those guys. I was ready to be done with school; I wanted to be out there... doing.

DJ: They are a pretty shiftless bunch, willing to just chat it up and spend Mommy and Daddy's money as opposed to earning their way. I don't relate to that part either, but I also don't relate to flying around in tights, yet still love Superman, you know? So... mayhap your like of dislike of this film has to do with something other than relating to or seeing yourself in the characters? Or am I barking up the wrong tree?

Dustin: Well, I'd not use the word "dislike" as much as, say... "indifference." I thought the film was okay. I got what it was supposed to accomplish, but I think the thing maybe felt a little too self-important. Maybe that's not even the right description -- I think I know the right word, but it occurs to me that I have no recollection as to how to spell it. That's what college did for me.

DJ: Ha! Yeah... actually, there is maybe a bit of smugness to the proceedings. On one hand, it didn't appeal to me, on the other, it made me wish I was an intellectual with money from New York or something. I'm very conflicted.

Dustin: Oh! You may have hit on something there. I think that might be the closest way in which I DID identify with it -- in that I never had a free-wheeling, almost... bohemian phase. And I sometimes wonder if I missed the boat on that. Like, I SHOULD have been doing that, but maybe my life was written by Kevin Smith instead of Noah Baumbach.

DJ: My Smith love is well known, but my Baumbach love is just developing. Still, there is something more working class, and, therefore, appealing to me (and you, it seems) about Smith's take on life. Still, though I don't completely relate to it, I enjoy Baumbach's characters and dialogue, especially in this flick (as well as his even less seen follow-up Mr. Jealousy and the aforementioned The Squid and the Whale. But, yeah, I see where you're coming from here.

Dustin: Well, we've spent plenty of time waxing philosophical about it now (and worked in our seemingly obligatory Kevin Smith reference). Shall we talk about some other aspects of the film?

DJ: Sure. The emotional core of the film is Grover not going off to Prague with the pretty damn hot Jane (Olivia d'Abo) for no real reason other than sometimes us dudes just roll that way only to regret it later. Did you enjoy the romantic aspect of the flick? And... am I weird for finding it oddly hot that Jane had a retainer? Not in a "she looks younger now" way, but in a totally, she's an adult woman who is attractive, and, for some reason, the retainer adds to it?

Dustin: Eh, I apparently don't have a retainer fetish. She was a deadly combination of smart and attractive, though. I enjoyed the romance story lines in all their shapes and forms here, which are plenty.

DJ: Indeed... Jane and Grover are the main one, ending at the beginning of the flick and told throughout via flashback, but Skippy (Jason Wiles) has a thing with undergrad Miami (forever indie film darling Parker Posey) that takes an interesting turn after Skippy graduates and goes from being an upperclassman worth looking up to to a kind of hanger on loser-type. While Skippy was my least favorite character (the hair... just dated and not his fault, though, as I'm sure it looked cool in '95), I enjoyed the pretty unique way their "love" deteriorated... Probably one of the most amusing scenes in the movie. Oh, and, shit, dude, I don't have a retainer fetish, either. I have one and hate it... No idea why Jane's had this effect on me.

Dustin: Like you, I do love a good Parker Posey appearance. In terms of the overall story, I thought that the romance plots were pretty dead on to things that I'd seen in real life. Sadly, even the one with the jailbait angle.

DJ: Uh, yeah... that was the weirdest one to me. Max (Chris Eigeman), the snobbiest of these snobby folks and most "intellectual," falls for a 16-year-old with giant hair (Cara Buono). What was that about? I don't think he realized she was so young when they first went out, but I'm still not sure why they ended up together other than he really wanted the proverbial "some," and she was a dumb kid who didn’t know better. Kind of surprised the age angle wasn't explored.

Dustin: So, one thing that I will give kudos about, hands down, was the level of acting brought to the table here. For a gigantic group of "that guys," "that chick," and Parker Posey, this was very solidly presented.

DJ: Yeah, this is definitely the type of flick a lot of actors would love to be in. Lots of dialogue and character-driven scenes. In fact, that's what they all say in the great supplemental material on the DVD. This, to me, with my limited experience that could no doubt be shredded by cenophiles the world over, is basically to white collar folks what Kevin Smith's films to the blue collar. My collar is definitely blue (and I resent that, wishing my parents could've set up a nice trust fund or something), but I appreciate this flick. Lots of interesting dialogue, situations, and some great acting.

Dustin: The direction was also solid -- anyone that says the pacing was bad really kind of misses the point in that it's paced to reflect the kind of life in the doldrums that the characters are living in. The same thing is evident in the film's color palate, which is all very drab and muted, save for the flashback bits.

DJ: You're right on that. This was Baumbach's first film, and he said that he really didn't know what he was doing as a director. He wrote the script (with Oliver Berkman), got it financed, and then just kind of hoped he could fake his way through it. Either he had a great director of photography who really held his hand, or he has an innate sense of filmmaking. For being a first film with the budget it had, this movie looks terrific.

Dustin: Agreed, although if you're watching it in the afternoon, glare from your living room windows can get annoyingly obtrusive.

DJ: Well, that goes for any movie, dude. Fucking glares. It's the worst. THE WORST!

Dustin: Okay, so overall... how'd you rate it?

DJ: I really enjoyed the damn thing, despite relating to some of your misgivings. Taking into account the really natural and amusing acting, funny and insightful dialogue, and really solid directing, I'm going to have to go with 4.5 out of 5 DGroves, despite the fact that the characters all wear blazers casually and tuck their shirts in.

Dustin: Just a sign of the times... it was the mid-nineties, after all. I'm going to stick with a flat cruising altitude of 3 out of 5 Kirks on this. Probably won't go out of my way to watch it again at any point.

DJ: Me on the other hand? If I had a more disposable income, I'd buy the sucker.