| ed. note: As it turns out, ninjas don't "get" limericks--something about the form and the inherent bawdiness of the poem just doesn't mix with our cold, deadly friends. But pirates? Was there ever a better vehicle for bawdiness? So to exploit the situation, here's a set of limericks for you.
One
The pirate named Peter was so feared,
t'was rumored he killed men with his beard.
But Pete always showed class
as he'd court a young lass;
He'd always keep li'l Peter well-reared.
Two
The pirates play softball--they don't hunt;
They tend to play fast-pitch and no-bunt.
But should a wench walk past,
a time out is called fast,
The play'rs like to stare at the girl's front.
Three
As pirates pass time on the night watch,
they soberly do so without scotch.
But that ol' pirate Greg,
you can bet your peg leg,
spends most of the night touching his crotch.
Four
A pirate has no paycheck to bank,
he'd just as soon blow it on some skank.
Although he could just feed
on ale, whiskey, and mead,
his dough will have some wench walk his plank. |
